Tennis Parents – Just Shut Up and Clap
The post by Allistair McCaw
Tennis parents – “Just shut up and clap” (Back by popular demand!)
Allistair McCaw
Tennis parents, shut up and clap. That’s right, just shut up and clap. Let the kid has fun. They are not all going to be pro’s. Maybe they don’t want to be pro’s, ever thought of that?
They are not going to make every ball. Heck, even the very best in the game get paid to do it and they sometimes fail…. The yelling, the screaming, the ‘what were you thinking?’
The tennis kid is already getting instruction on the field/court, but doesn’t need it on the sidelines, doesn’t need to hear about it in the car on the way home either.
The worst thing for a junior tennis player is to see disappointment on a parent’s face. When asked, most kids just want their parents to be parents. They simply want support and encouragement, not another person handing out instructions.
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Don’t disagree with sentiment Alistair, but sick and tired of tired of being told to shut up and go away. It is the resort of all poor coaches to blame the parents
When parent do not control themselves, they create unnecessary stress to their kids. During matches, uncontrolled parents create a second opponent for their kids during the match (or practice). One on the court and another one outside the court. The second is the worst opponent because it is hard to please.
Well said. Kids love any game/sport because it is fun. They want to have fun and not to have faulty adults spoiling it for them.
This is a difficult topic. I agree that parents should “shut up and clap” when it comes to competition, but they are involved in the kid’s tennis whether they like it or not. Tennis is an individual sport that requires a financial and time investment from the parent, so they quite rightly want to make sure they are not wasting their time. They should be selective when it comes to the choice of coach, for sure, but once they have chosen, allow the coach to do their job. Getting on the kid during matches only makes them dread competition! The kids improvement is closely related to their enjoyment of the sport!
One of my great finds as a tennis parent was a mini booklet called the “Passport To Your Child’s Success in Tennis.” I still carry copies with me because you never know when you have an opportunity to “save” a tennis parent from jumping off the cliff.
In the booklet, there is a reference to a research study conducted by Michigan State University that indicates “over 70% of kids drop out of youth sports by the age of 13. And the top 3 reasons are adults.” I bet the number in tennis is even higher.
There’s a Top 10 list of “Most Importants” in the booklet and interestingly enough, the title for Number 9 is: Be quiet and LET THEM PLAY! There are two short pages of supporting information but to summarize… Tennis is about playing in the zone. Your kid already knows you are there. They will perform better if they don’t hear you.
P.S. I have no affiliations with the author of this booklet.
Nice and valuable information. I will look for the booklet.
Is it a blue booklet with the title PASSPORT?
That’s the one.
Thanks.
If you do NOT want your kid to be a pro (or, at least, reach a level of good college tennis scholarship)…
If you do NOT believe that your kid can play a competitive tennis…
If you see tennis just as “one more hobby” like judo, painting and violin on Sundays…
If you are not ready to spend a lot, sacrifice a lot and actually change your life to help your kid reach his/her tennis dream…
At all, if tennis is just a kind of recreation for your kid & your whole family, and you are definitely NOT seeking more…
Than shut up & clap.
Otherwise not.