How to Train Young Talented Kids
The post by Allistair McCaw
Every parent of a talented kid should read this: 70% of talented kids drop out of their sport before age 13.
The reality is, 70% of all kids quit organized sports by the age of 13, and the number one reason they cite is that it is not fun anymore. Personally, having been around the sports world for over 30 years now, growing up as a kid, competing professionally for 10 years, and now coaching, I have seen this first hand.
There can be a few reasons why kids drop out early:
1. Over zealous parents
Parents are fueled by their talented kids to spend all their time and money on pursuing the kids’ sports career. They feel the more, the better, when in fact it’s that continual push that can at most times send their kid over the edge.
They also seem to panic when other kids the same age as theirs might be winning or doing better, so they make changes in coaches (-also known as ‘coach hopping’) and add on more tournaments.
2. Too much competition at a young age
Burn out and over playing can occur at a very early age. Kid’s that compete too much and too early are in the 70% category of quitting a sport sooner than later.
Too much competition at a young age also means that they are not busy doing the things they should be doing more of, like athletic skill and technical development.
3. It’s not fun anymore
The kid doesn’t enjoy playing anymore due to the loss of fun. They are always practicing or playing matches. Also, the pressure and more attention to simply ‘winning’ applied by coach and/or parent. The fun is simply drained out of it because of ‘win at all cost’ coaches and over-pressuring parents.
Kids also start to see their friends having more fun having more balance in their lives, playing other sports and going to friends’ houses, fun activities, etc. Always remember what the number 1 reason was why kids started to play a particular sport – because it’s FUN.
4. Too high expectations
When a kid is extremely talented at a young age or showing great potential, a lot of parents will be constantly told how brilliant or great their kid is.
This is the mistake of society. Kids are put on pedestals way before they have earned it or should have.
Ridiculous as it may sound, but here in the United States, I have heard parents of kids under the age of 12 years talking to University and college coaches about getting their kids to go there!
A massive weight of expectation is placed on these kid’s shoulders the moment they win a tiny insignificant tournament or competition!
And while I’m on that subject, parents pulling their kids out of school before 14, what are you thinking? Give your kids Balance and Education for as long as possible! It’s understandable that sometimes arrangements in time scheduling need to be made, but pulling a kid from the classroom permanently at these ages is more harm than good.
Over the past 10 years or so, I’ve had parents of immensely talented kids who they’ve pulled out of school, bring their kid to me, and what I mostly find is a kid who plays a sport pretty well, but hardly has any friends, balance in life or social skills!
I fear for the kid if they ‘don’t make it’ in tennis because it’s all they know.
Finally, the most important thing as a parent or coach is to always make sure the kid is having fun.
I would recommend that both the parent and coach, provide the balance to this equation.
Parents, your role is simple: Just be there to lend unconditional love and support. Also, remember to let the coach, coach. Have some integrity and patience, stop the coach hopping and thinking the grass is always greener when another kid does well. Most of all – let your kid decide if they still find it fun. It should be their choice.
Coaches, make sure the vital stages of athlete/player development are adhered too. Don’t get caught up in the demands or pressures of the kid playing tournaments every weekend.
Remember: Develop the Athlete before the player. But most important of all, help develop their enjoyment for the game as well as life skills. Stay the course. Enjoy the journey.
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Great point. Colleges are definitely of the Xavier’s School for Gift Youngsters path. Even at my child’s elementary each of his buddy’s competitively pursues “fun” specialization whether it is coding, skateboarding, soccer or tennis.
Can you please provide me some more details about how kids can have fun, 9-12 years old ?
My kid is currently playing Grade 2/1/A ITF Juniors tournament, will hopefully play Junior Grand Slam(s) next year. This year we rejected an invitation from very good US University, with 100% scholarship.
The kid have not attend a school from being 11… as most of friends who play competitive tennis on ITF Juniors higher levels.
In the club, the kid plays with other kids, which are also motivated, have fun etc… But those kids can hardly win a couple of games from my kid, not because mine is a kind of genious… But because my kid has approximately 6,000 hours more spent on court because of not attending “regular” school.
So how can you expect from a kid to become a player – I mean, a real tennis player -, if “there is somebody near you, who trains harder than you, smarter than you and longer than you”?